The feeling was lingering. 

It had started to creep up weeks before my agent called saying the Winnipeg Blue Bombers wanted to sign me. It persisted as I signed the contract, through my goodbye dinner, and as I packed my suitcase. It didn’t subside once I boarded the plane, and only grew stronger once I landed in Winnipeg and made my way through baggage claim. When I saw the assistant coach holding a sign with my name, as we drove past Investors Group Field, and as I sat alone in the university dorm room, it only grew worse. 

This was not the first time I felt this way, and it surely hasn’t been the last.

Those thoughts had started by the time I got to Western University as a relatively highly recruited receiver. Almost every school in the country had reached out at some point during the process despite the fact I had only played 15 games.

Though I was adjusting on the field, I felt entirely out of place off of it. There was no one I connected with, who shared my interests or tastes, or who understood the subculture I was increasingly becoming a part of. I felt out of touch. 

That is until I met Eric Richards. He’s the single greatest gift I received going to Western and would become my best friend and creative partner to this day. Not only was he also highly recruited, but also from Toronto.

We quickly realized a shared sensibility, one where while everyone would wear a tie to our press conferences, we would have G-SHOCKS and Vans (it was 2011). When everyone was studying for exams, we were sharing music inspiration and design references. During parties we were in the corner discussing studio names and dream collaborators. We were building our brand without even knowing it.

As my sophomore year at Western wrapped up, I was over it. I felt overlooked. Injuries crept up on me and I lost the allure of my coaches. The combination of having to undergo off-season surgery (leaving my junior year in jeopardy), and the appeal of moving back to Toronto to start a clothing brand, led me to take the next step: I transferred to the University of Toronto.

Growing up in Toronto, I was a three-sport athlete and late bloomer in hockey. My chance at the OHL didn’t happen and I focused more on soccer and football. My interests off the field also started to take shape in high school with skateboarding being my introduction to the cultural relationship between sports, music and fashion. This manifested as a love for streetwear – a desire to create and be considered “in touch.” My lens changed; how I wanted to present myself, what I deemed “cool”, what music I was listening to; decisions that used to be passive were now conscious.

I started every game over the next two years for the Varsity Blues, although my injuries continued to mount and my explosiveness and confidence waned. 

Despite being bigger and stronger than ever before, I was frustrated I still hadn’t reached my potential. 

My attention was shifting toward my new and exciting venture. I was enjoying the learning curve of constructing clothes and even more-so, creating a world for the clothes to live and breathe. Eric and I started putting the pieces together, learning by trial and error and using our student loans to produce samples and print shirts. I was skipping classes for fittings and taking the bus across the city in order to purchase fabric. A year after transferring home, we released our first capsule collection and landed our first wholesale account. 

I was at a crossroad after graduating. Doctors recommended I step away from the game after many hamstring issues throughout my senior season along with a massive labral tear. At the same time, I was content after being accepted to teaching college and the brand needed attention. I was excited to push it forward. 

But I still had one year left of eligibility and my head coach reminded me I would always be able to pursue my business, but not always play football. There was a new coaching staff in place who believed in my talent and I was feeling physically and mentally fresh after spending the off-season away from the game. 

It turned out to be the right decision to go back as I became a provincial all-star and finished among the league leaders in receptions, receiving yards and yards per catch.

I trained for the CFL Combine over the following months while laying the groundwork to launch WIL Studios - an acronym for WHAT I LIKE. It was an uncertain, exciting, and challenging time. In February 2017, we released our first collection and the following month I dominated the combine and signed with an agent.

Two months later, I was at lunch when I received the call. Twenty-four hours later I was in Winnipeg and … that feeling came over me. 

When you’ve worked your entire life to realize your dream of playing professional sports and the opportunity finally presents itself, it’s nearly impossible to turn it down. I figured that my excitement would override my uncertainty.

It wasn’t the case. During one team meeting, I looked up and realized I would rather be designing. I wasn’t in the mindset to put in the extra work needed to compete at the level I was accustomed to. I was going through the motions amongst men who play the game in order to feed their families. 

I was a designer who was good at football, not a football player. I liked the idea that WIL Studios wasn’t limited by my athleticism or durability, but rather by my imagination and work ethic. So, I went to speak with the head coach and a few days later I was back home in Toronto.

People have told me they respect that I was able to walk away. It honestly wasn’t a tough choice. 

Don’t get me wrong, it wasn’t smooth sailing right off the bat with WIL Studios. We made a lot of mistakes – expensive mistakes -- learned on the fly, shared a bedroom to afford studio space, and changed directions multiple times. 

We outfitted Daniel Caesar during his tour of the Grammy-nominated “Freudian” album, including appearances on Late Night with Seth Meyers and Jimmy Kimmel Live, along with merchandise collaborations which sold out within hours of going live. The same newspaper that reported that I had been “cut” by the Blue Bombers was now picking up a story about two kids who used to work for the same Hudson’s Bay which now stocked their brand. We began working in a creative capacity for musicians and corporate clients, eventually launching WHAT I LIKE Studios this past year.

Recently we’ve taken a step back to re-define everything from our mission to our product offering. To really trust ourselves, the way we were raised, and what we find interesting or funny. I embrace the fact that we didn’t go to school for fashion as an advantage. 

We have a natural sports influence rooted in growing up on streetwear, though it’s hard to believe my work isn’t also influenced by my athletic career. We cared too much about what we looked like on the field for that to not have carried into our design thinking. And, through it all, we still ideate the same way we did in 2011 – by telling stories and deriving narratives to drive our campaigns. We’re making what we think is great and have confidence other people will too.

I have learned to simply trust my judgment. This is what our whole brand is built upon and it speaks to the lessons I’ve learned along the way. It’s why I chose to pursue football instead of soccer or teacher’s college, why I felt confident leaving both Western and Winnipeg, why we design the product that we do, and why I know WIL Studios is my life path. 

Sometimes you already have the answers, and you need to trust that. I know the type of person I am and what I stand for, and that gives me the confidence to make the decisions I need to make. 

So anytime I have that feeling – I know what to do.